You Want Us To What!
by RanmaLove
Summary: What if Ukyo wanted Ranma and Akane to do a little more than just share a room?
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½

You Want Us To What?

**Chapter One**

__"Have a good night sleep, Ran-chan?" Ukyo teased with only minor bitterness. "I know Akane can be such pleasant company."

Ranma cringed at the accusation in her voice. "Y-Yup. I'm happy as clams."

"Well, it just so turns out, Ranma Honey that I don't have enough proof of the fact that you and Akane sleep in the same room," she pointed out merrily. "For all I know, you can be sneaking out and sleeping elsewhere but return by morning."

Ranma wondered what it was his longtime friend had in mind. Ukyo was no Shampoo, but that didn't mean she never thought up a wicked scheme or two under the table. For his safety from Akane, he quickly responded, "What? Then shouldn't that be the case with all married couples?"

She frowned. Hearing Ranma refer to his and Akane's relationship as 'married' only angered the sixteen-year-old chef more. But, today she concocted a brilliant plan. A plan so flawless and indestructible, it was nearly perfect. "But the point is you have to prove it to me, Ran-chan. Without proof, how does anything you say appear legit?"

He raised an eyebrow. "What do you have in mind?" 

Her smile returned. "If you and Akane are as happy as you claim...," she allowed her sentence to trail, amused by the confused expression present on his handsome features. "I want you and Akane to share a bed."

When she said those words, one thought formed into Ranma's mind: _I am going to die. _It took him longer to form the appropriate words to respond. He had to fight this idea with every fiber of his being or else Akane was surely going to go to jail for his murder. "How does that make anything else different? It's not like you'll be in the same room with us."

"I'll have nightly checkups."

"Then, why didn't you do this earlier? When we shared a room?"

"If I didn't know you any better, Ranma, I would say you're afraid."

If he said no, she'll obviously expect that this whole charade is a lie. Then she'll keep pursuing him, he'll keep receiving medical treatment from the injuries of Akane's mallet, and everyone in the Tendo dojo would go bankrupt from the bills. He swallowed. "Ranma Saotome fears nothing. Especially sleeping with... with... the woman of his dreams."

Her smile broadened. "Excellent! I can't wait to see how this happy couple turns out," she began skipping down the pavement, waving at him one last time. "See you in class!"

_I am going to die._

**-XxX-**

"So, then you just distribute the parenthesis and multiply. Easy right?" His blue-haired fiancée said, surprised from Ranma's reaction. Usually he would jump for joy whenever he solved an equation correctly, but now he just seemed lost in thought. "Ranma? Hello! Ranma?"

He snapped out of his daze, grinning sheepishly at her. "Right, I solved it. Yippee."

She rested her head in between her hands. "If you're tired, we can just stop for now. You can go ahead and take a break," she paused, reading his facial expression. "Or, you can tell me what's going on before I get mad."

_And get killed? No thanks. _He thought to himself, waving dismissively at her. "It has nothing to do with an uncute girl like yourself."

She grabbed her bokken leaning against her bed and smashed it over his head, causing him to rub at his injury furiously. "That hurt you know," he said angrily inspecting the wound for any serious damages. "You're as uncute as ever. How am I going to sleep with a girl like that?"

"Sleep with me?" She repeated in blunt disbelief, a slight blush appearing on her face. Once she repeated the words enough, she slowly rose her bokken once more to harm the suspecting boy. "Why... you... pervert!"

"Is that fighting I hear?" Ukyo asked rhetorically, her smile wide with high hopes as she swung open the couple's door.

Akane instantly tossed the bokken aside, plastering on a forced smile as she romantically slung her hand around Ranma's neck. "The only thing we're fighting is the urge to just snuggle up together!"

"Good to know," she responded, her tone dripping with ill-conceived hatred. "Well, good news for you is that you'll be able to do that tonight when you're sleeping together!"

She was lost. "What're you talking about?"

"Well, thanks for ruining the surprise, Ucchan," Ranma intervened, his voice filled with false anger. "I was hoping to tell the good news to my dear honey here during our stroll at the park!"

It finally registered, as she glanced at both Ranma and Ukyo. The comment he made earlier, _this _was what he was referring to. _She doesn't think we can do it, _she thought while staring at the brunette. Why else would she propose such a bold idea? If this was a challenge, then she would gladly accept it, no matter what the consequences. She would make Ukyo Kuonji eat those words.

"I'm so happy!" Akane exclaimed, clapping enthusiastically. "Just one more step we're taking in this very **successful **relationship."

"Attaboy, Ranma!" Genma and Soun cried in unison, both of them wrapping an arm around Ranma. "I always knew you had guts!"

"But they're far too young," Kasumi said with evident concern.

"You're so old fashioned, Kasumi," Nabiki replied, the edges of her lips curved into a grin. "Besides, isn't it about time they slept together?"

"The stroll in the park, honey?" Akane glanced at Ranma pleadingly.

"Yes, dear."

**-XxX-**

"You're telling me she told you this before class today?" He nodded. "Then, why did you save this until now, moron? You're telling me you couldn't come up with one simple idea to ward off this stupid plan of hers?"

"Maybe I should have summoned up a ghost that could abduct her? Or, or, even better! I could have gotten a child out of the orphanage and told her it was ours! Or, Akane, do you think it would have been better to tell her a natural disaster was coming to completely destroy Nerima's existence?"

"Be serious, Ranma!" She replied, a smile still finding its way on her face.

"All we need is one night, Akane," Ranma sighed, placing his hands behind his head. "Then, I can go back to the comfiness of my room and be as far away from your wrath as possible."

"IDIOT!"

He sailed through the cool night air, wondering how in the world he was going to get through the night alive.

**-XxX-**

It's time, she thought anxiously to herself, stripping herself of her casual wear and slipping into her yellow pajamas. At any moment, Ranma was going to enter through that door with Ukyo trailing behind him eagerly awaiting the downfall of tonight.

_Ba-bum, Ba-bum, Ba-bum_

She rested her hand on her chest, feeling her heartbeat accelerating more as the minutes past by. A boy was going to be in her bed tonight. Scratch that, Ranma was going to be in her bed tonight! Maybe she should pick the right side of her bed to sleep on so she could get out and in to her room with ease. Or maybe it was better to pick the left side so she could kick Ranma if he tried something perverted?

Why in the world was she being so picky about the situation? She didn't like Ranma, and Ranma didn't like her... so there was no reason to be nervous. She just had to stay strong until tomorrow morning. Her eyes glanced at the clock that read: eleven pm. Seven hours was all she technically needed to survive for this situation. Then Ukyo would be out of their life and things could go back to normal.

"Honey, I'm coming in!"

"C-Come on in, dear!" She replied, her whole body suddenly trembling violently.

He entered, shutting the door behind him. He exhaled deeply, signaling that they were completely alone for the time being. His eyes quickly analyzed the girl, thankful that Ukyo didn't request something unnecessary like Akane's wardrobe for their "big night".

His father forced him in a tank top although he would have been perfectly fine with his green pajamas. His father also suggested shorts, but Ranma was able to fend of his dad's and Soun's alliance and wore sweatpants.

"Is the couple settled in?" Ukyo's voice rang, followed by the rest of the family entrance.

"Yes," Ranma spoke up, ushering the crowd out the door. "Thanks for visiting. See you in the morning!"

_Slam!_

Her face was set ablaze as her fingers fumbled nervously searching for something casual to say in their situation. Her mind went blank. "Ranma?" Was all she could mutter, not sure why it came out as a question.

He could feel his own heart ready to burst through his chest as a feeling adrenaline spread throughout his body. He coughed awkwardly, "Don't worry about anything, Akane! I've already told you that you're not my type! Besides, a tomboy like yourself couldn't be worried about anything!"

Exactly as she suspected, Ranma was not sweating this at all, so why should she? "Here are the rules for tonight," she fumed, stepping closer to the fear-stricken boy. "If you as so much lay a finger on me I swear your father will be preparing for a funeral tomorrow. You keep to your side, I'll keep to mine."

"Which one is my side?"

She glanced once more at her bed which was suddenly appearing smaller the more closer she approached it. If she was more closer to the edge, how was she suppose to know what Ranma was doing behind her? But, if she was closer to the wall... what if she got thirsty? Or hungry? Or needed to use the bathroom? Oh, well. She'll just have to take her chances.

"I'm sleeping with my back against the wall, you sleep on the edge. Don't you _dare _touch me. You've been warned, Ranma."

He glared but kept silent gesturing her dramatically toward her side of the bed. She slipped in and squirmed her way to the wall and once she was there, returned his glare fiercely. He waited a few more moments for her to finally settle in before he came after her. He kept his promise and left two or three centimeters of space between them.

She analyzed him from behind, never being in such close proximity with him. His muscles were relaxed yet still flexed as he tried to find a comfortable position. He was so much larger than her it still amazed her, unknowingly searching for weak points for the next time they spar.

"Is there a reason why you're staring at me?" He asked, and she could hear the smile on his face as he did so. "Thinking of something, Akane? Who's the perverted one now?"

She blushed, slapping him on the back of his head. "Shut up, Ranma. No one's thinking of anything."

"Whatever you say, honey." He said sarcastically, releasing a sigh. "You know, you can breathe too."

It was at that moment she realized she was holding her breath, and nervously exhaled. She also relaxed her muscles, realizing her body was as straight and stiff as a board. There was just something about having Ranma in bed with her, her rude fiancé who only sometimes acted like he cared for her. But, Ranma cared for everyone, and she was no exception.

Ranma only appeared casual, though because his hair was matted to his forehead caused by the sweat pouring down his face. Why was he so nervous? Ranma was never nervous, unless it involved cats, of course. But, right now there was no cats... just Akane. He didn't– couldn't like Akane, right? If Shampoo or Ukyo were here, he would be nervous too.

Right?

Or maybe it's just staying in a bed with any girl that makes him nervous? He knew Shampoo and Ukyo would have tried something, but there was no way in the world Akane would make a move in a situation like this, let alone make a move at all. She didn't even like him, which he knew for a fact.

When she was in love with Dr. Tofu, she was kind and happy and jumped at any chance to be with him. She trusted him with her injuries, issues, she just trusted him. Period. With Ranma, she always hit him for no reason and was always so angry. Suddenly he felt an odd feeling of anger toward Dr. Tofu, wondering what in the world gave him the right to have someone like Akane in love with him... and not even give her the time of day.

"Ranma, Akane? Come in, this is Nabiki."

The two jumped up, searching their room for where the noise was coming from. "Nabiki, where are you?" They both asked in unison.

"Don't worry about that. You two have been sleeping together for the past two hours and not one of you are speaking? Do you honestly want Ukyo to stay here forever? If not, then prove you two are married. Now!" 

The two were blushing unknowingly of the other's feelings in the dark, not knowing who should speak up first. "You don't want–" Ranma began.

"I want Ukyo gone," Akane whispered, searching for Ranma's hand. When she found it, she felt him jolt and almost was discouraged to continue but did so anyway. "I'll give you just a small break this time."

He silently felt her guide his hand over her waist and he unconsciously scooted closer so that her head was right as his chest. "It's fine," he whispered, the heat in his face traveling in _other _places. "I don't want to do this either, but if it gets rid of Ukyo..."

"Good night, Ranma." Akane said in a hushed tone, a feeling of security taking over as Ranma tightened his grip.

"Good night, 'Kane." He replied, feeling an emotion he never has before, something he couldn't quite put into words. But, he pushed it aside as he enjo– put up with Akane's closeness to him and drifted off to sleep.

Ukyo felt her heart crushed at the sight of Ranma and Akane touching each other in a romantic way. She clenched her fist, ignoring her womanly instinct to kill Akane. "This isn't over. One way or another, I'm going to prove that you too aren't married!"

**-XxX-**

A/N: This came to me in a dream because I was dreaming about Ranma and Akane sleeping together and Akane just like kicked Ranma in the head. Also, when I was re-watching Ranma and got to the episode that had the scene, I put the two and two together and thus, this story was born!

Please review, and I hope you all are enjoying your summer vacation! I know I am! :D


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½

You Want Us To What!

**Chapter Two**

During the sixteen years Ranma's been alive, he's had his fair share of awkward moments. But, at this particular moment, he has never seen a more awkward position. Being the sloppy sleeper he is, his arms and legs spread out openly occupying Akane's bed. At some point unbeknownst to him, his left hand wandered on Akane's shirt. More exactly, on her breast. So, now here he was face-to-face with his violent "wife" as her body trembled uncontrollably out of fury.

"A-Akane, it ain't what it looks like!" He babbled, snatching his hands back to safety. "I didn't mean to do it! I swear!"

But, what was he honestly expecting? For Akane to suddenly smile at him and say, "Is that so, Ranma? My mistake for misinterpreting the whole situation. Let's go get some breakfast, okay?"? Of course she would only say something cute like that in his imagination. So, his face braced for impact, for the fist of fury to travel at the speed of light and crash this unfortunate victim into the koi pond. Ultimately, him beginning his morning as a girl.

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

He uncovered his face, arms slightly apart as he gazed at Akane through the small crack his mind reluctantly allowed to open. He expected her to patiently await for the barrier around his face to crumble so she could get better aim, but was instead unreadable; her eyes hidden behind her bangs as her body lay motionless in its position. He suddenly began to wonder what stopped her from assuming the worst in him as she usually did, before gathering enough courage to lean forward and tilt his head just enough so he was now able to glance at her face. "Akane...?"

"Ranma," she began through gritted teeth, glaring daggers at the pigtailed boy. "The only thing restraining me from breaking every single bone in your body is the fact that Ukyo's probably eavesdropping. If it were any other time, you'd be a dead man."

A grin lit his face, suddenly realizing some advantages this situation was bringing. Maybe he was going about it all wrong, and decided to ponder over the positives aspects. For one, he couldn't be beaten around every time she wished, and her uncute attitude would have to be... well, _cute_! His grin broadened into a full smile, sending an uneasy feeling lingering in her mind.

"What's with that look?"

He shrugged his response, effortlessly and gracefully leaping out of bed before landing perfectly on his feet. "Nothin'," he replied, whistling a tune as he sauntered through the door. "See you downstairs, **hon-ey**."

She cringed at the emphasis of the word, and began wondering what exactly Ranma had in mind. She literally threatened to murder the guy, and he moseys out of their room _happily_! That pervert was probably thinking of a few jokes to ridicule her chest! Well, she would have to make sure Ukyo was absolutely convinced they were married so she could freely beat the tar out of Ranma whenever the chance arose! The world would be better off without one more lecher wandering the streets anyway.

With that she yawned and rose from the bed, slipping her feet into her slippers before heading toward the bathroom. There standing before her door was Ukyo, a towel draped over one shoulder as her hair was tied in a lazy ponytail. The two gazed at each other for what seemed an eternity, before Akane forced a smile across her face. "Good morning, Ukyo!" She smiled enthusiastically, eyeing the girls disheveled pajamas and toothbrush. "Were you heading to take a bath?"

It took more than a few extra seconds for Ukyo to summon a smile, before returning Akane's enthusiasm with her own. "Yup!" She nodded, jingling her bath supplies. "Care to join?"

"Sure." She agreed, falling into step beside the brunette. For some reason, Akane held the feeling of superiority over Ukyo even if it was just from last night. It was odd for her to have the upper hand, so she decided to enjoy every minute of it. "Did you end up visiting us last night? Because, I never did end up seeing you, you know."

The okonomiyaki chef tightened her grip on the soap, disgusted by Akane's taunting innocence. "I did, yeah," she began, swallowing hard as she cast Akane a sidelong glance. "If I didn't know your history together, I certainly would have been fooled. Lucky for me, Ranchan's episode this morning confirmed that he wasn't interested in you."

Akane stopped, losing composure for just a moment before glancing at Ukyo again with feigned confusion. "Episode? What do you mean?"

"This morning, his hand accidentally fell on your breast, right?" Ukyo suddenly grasped the slight advantage she had with Akane's hesitation and flashed her a genuine, triumphant grin. "He shouldn't have been so nervous if it was his _wife_ he was touching, now would he?"

She mentally cursed Ranma for his mistake of being so noisy in the morning before quickly retorting her poorly thought out plan. "Yeah, and he only became nervous because he didn't want to seem as though he was pushing me or anything." Leaning closer to Ukyo, her voice suddenly became low and her words concise. "But, did you hear _my_ response?"

Ukyo shook her head, penetrated from Akane's stare. For as long as she's known Akane, Ranma always referred to her as the "uncute" fiancée. But, at this very moment, where Akane's short hair fell perfectly around her round face and her brown eyes lit with intensity and passion– she wondered just _who_ was the uncute one. Just to surprise her even more, a slow, seductive smile played across Akane's face. "I told him he'd just have to wait for tonight." Then, just as quickly as it appeared, it disappeared, Akane returning to her normal self as she slipped open the bathroom door and smiled at her companion. "Let's hurry before the water turns cold."

"Y-yeah." She finished lamely, this round of battle clearly won by Akane. She stripped off her sleep attire and entered into the soothing hot water, letting out a contented sight as she spread her arms out on the bathtub rails. "This feels so nice..."

"Doesn't it?" Akane agreed, secretly releasing a breath she wasn't aware she was holding. Where did she have the audacity to proclaim such lewd things to Ukyo anyway? Who knows what Ukyo is going to ask them to do for today? Oh, and then there was Ranma, of course. If Ranma discovered she uttered those perverted words to Ukyo, he would mock her into her grave! She hugged her knees to her chest and sank lower into the water, bubbles forming around her mouth as she muttered insults to her unaware, soon-to-be dead fiancé. Well, in _her_ mind he remained as her fiancé.

It didn't matter as long as Ukyo maintained the mentality that Ranma complimented her by calling her cute. The girl's beauty was rarely commented on since everyone believed she was a boy. Except for that cross-dresser Tsubasa, of course. Honestly, how could she have fallen in love with a boy who merely tossed her a kind word? Heck, if that was the case, Ukyo could have fallen for anyone! She sighed, rubbing the soap over her tensed body.

Ukyo _was _beautiful, and if Ranma hadn't been in their way, she was certain they could have become close friends. But, here she was in the middle of a mess that Ranma should have cleaned up a long time ago. Images of last night flashed through her mind at the mention of his name, and she felt heat rise to her face as she realized the aftermath of her actions. But, it was a weird kinda pleasant feeling that embraced her body and soul when Ranma wrapped his arms around her waist. But, of course it was acting and she had to remember. Acting was acting. No passion, honesty, or genuine feelings.

She dumped the rest of the contents of the bucket on her body before rising, wrapping her body around in a towel. "I'm gonna head out first, Ukyo," she called over her shoulder. "Make sure you don't stay in too long or else you'll be late for school."

"'Kay, sugar!"

Akane clothed herself in her Furinkan uniform, sighing as she headed downstairs to join the rest of her family at the table. Upon entering the kitchen, she lazily dropped routinely down next to Ranma before beginning breakfast.

"Oh, well, if it isn't the married couple!" Nabiki began with a sly smirk. "Nice performance yesterday."

"W-well, it ain't like we had a choice," Ranma countered, his face still a deep shade of red as he spoke. "'Sides, it's not like we meant anything by it. Right, Akane?"

_Theory proven, _she thought bitterly, biting down on her tongue. "Of course, stupid." She responded, angrily slurping down her ramen. "If it wasn't for Ukyo, I would have punted you through a window!"

Nabiki rolled her eyes, chewing on the end of her chopstick. "I really need you guys to speed this process up. With Ukyo hanging on Ranma all the time, it's bad for business. How am I suppose to take photos when you two look so miserable?"

"An' you think _that's _the problem?" Ranma asked, not surprised by the middle Tendo's lack of sympathy. Nabiki was Nabiki, and money was all she seemed to care for.

Nabiki shrugged her response, watching Ranma turn his attention to Akane instead. "Hey, we should probably get going."

"Sure..." She replied, her voice seeming distant as she was more in tune with her thoughts. There had to be some way to fully convince, without the slightest of doubts, that her and egghead over here were married. She could hear Ukyo's footsteps approaching and stood abruptly, extending her hand to Ranma with the most cute smile she could manage with at the moment. "Walk me to school, Ranma?"

His heart froze. His body froze. His mind froze. For a brief second, all he could see was Akane's hand, and an enchanting smile encouraging his hand to unconsciously find their way into hers. "Yeah..." He replied, before hearing Ukyo arriving into the kitchen. His body reawakened then, reminding him that she was acting, and there was no true passion behind her words. Regardless, he was content with this for now.

Soun wiped his eyes, passing over a box of tissues to Genma. "A memorable day, isn't that right, Saotome?"

"You said it, Tendo," he agreed, dramatically shaking his head from side-to-side as he sniffled. "You said it."

Ukyo surprisingly said nothing, her eyes not even meeting Ranma's or Akane's as she smiled at Nabiki. "Hey, sugar," she said brightly, handing her an okonomiyaki. "I made it just for you. I know how you hate spending money on school lunch."

Nabiki laid her head in her palms, glancing up at Ukyo's generous offer. "I guess I can spare Kuno Baby a few extra yen," she replied, her lips curling into her signature smile– if you can call it that, that is. "But, I'm guessing this has a little something to do with business?"

"A little." Ukyo smiled, batting her eyelashes innocently.

"Name your terms, Ukyo."

Meanwhile, Ranma and Akane trudged to school, Akane glaring fiercely at Ranma. "Geez, Ranma! Does it look like we can hold hands if we're walking on the fence?"

"Well, maybe if _you_ we're a good martial artist, _we _could." He shot back, letting out a little yelp as her fingernails dug deep into his palm. "Lay off, would you?"

Her glare only intensified. "That's what you get for your little perverted action this morning," she spat through gritted teeth, before turning her attention elsewhere. She was determined to ignore him all day until she was forced to acknowledge him. Unfortunately, she suddenly felt her hands going moist and stared disgustingly at him. "Why are you sweating so much?"

"I'm nervous," he responded, all hostility exiting out of his system as Furinkan came into view.

She smiled. It was sort of cute to see the great Ranma Saotome get anxious every once in a while. Especially if she was the one causing it. "Don't worry about it, Ranma. I'm sure–"

"What will everyone think once they see me holding hands with an uncute girl like you?"

"DIE, RANMA!" She fumed, releasing the grip she held on him and aiming straight for his... _smiling _face?

"Ah, ah, ah," he began, wagging a finger at her as though she was a child. "If you hit me out here in the open, how will we ever get Ukyo to believe we're married?" He smiled at her silence, finally feeling he was avenging himself for ever being sent soaring across the world from his enraged fiancee.

"Ranma?" She began sweetly.

"Yeah?"

Her voice suddenly hissed low enough for no one else but Ranma to hear as she whispered in his ear, "I'm making you lunch everyday starting tomorrow," she began, smiling as she felt his body stiffen. "I'm sure that will _certainly _assure Ukyo we're married."

A chill ran down his spine, various medicines flashing in his mind and a horrid image of himself rocking back and forth in bed in agony, awaiting death to save him from his pain. He suddenly forgot all of his dominance and intertwined their hands once more, complimenting her every step of the way. "You know, Akane. You're a lot cuter than I give you credit for! I mean, you're just so beautiful! Do you want me to get that door for you, honey? Oh, and let me pull out your chair for you!"

"I'm fine, Ranma. And if it makes you feel any better, you're off the hook too," she heard him release a sigh of relief before planting himself in his assigned seat next to her. She frowned a little at the fact he despised her cooking so much, but found herself giggling regardless of his actions. "Gee, Ranma. You're so predictable." She managed to say through fits of laughter.

"Uncute," he responded, but couldn't stop his eyes from staring at his beaming fiancée as his thoughts betrayed his words.

But what still awaited them was that stupid bedroom..

**-XxX-**

The rest of the day winded down slowly after Ranma walked Akane home once more. They bickered as usual, but kept it to a minimum as Ukyo skipped merrily next to them the whole way. When asked, they replied with "lovers quarrel" and she shrugged indifferently, her eagerness for night eating away at her.

Once home, Akane went upstairs to finish her homework, Ranma went to practice a little in the dojo, and Ukyo assisted Kasumi in the kitchen. Several hours passed before dinner was called for, and the Tendo and Saotome family rushed to the table, conversations springing to life.

Ukyo watched in silence, however, as Ranma murmured something to Akane about Happosai before the couple burst into laughter. _Soon, _she reassured herself. _Soon you'll expose them both and Ranma will be in your restaurant preparing your wedding in no time!_

Akane caught on to Ukyo's quite calm demeanor and passed a smile toward her, simply reminding her that she was no fool, and her guard wasn't completely down. Ukyo returned her smile with a passionate exchange with Ranma, discussing childhood memories Akane couldn't even imagine. A light blush appeared on his face, begging Ukyo not to mention an "incident" he had in the third grade.

"Don't worry about it, Ranchan," she replied, "what happens between us, _**stays**_between us."

This caught Akane's attention, her mind wondering what secrets were being kept between the longtime friends. She mentally checked herself, not allowing Ukyo to fill her mind with any doubts. She did trust Ranma, after all. And he would never do something indecent and then disclose something with Ukyo and not her. The girl was just trying to bother her... but man was it working!

"Akane, can I talk to you?" Nabiki asked, already rising from the table. "There's this thing that's really been bothering me and I know that strength of yours will fix it right up."

"C-coming!" She rose as well, following her sister out the back porch in front of the koi pond. "What's up?"

"I'm about to give you some advice," Nabiki began, reaching out her hand. "It's only fair you should be charged a fee for what I'm so generously giving to you."

"Ugh, Nabiki I don't have time for this!" She replied, turning on her heel before heading toward the house once more. She couldn't afford doubts to cloud her judgement if she permitted Ranma to be alone with that conniving Ukyo.

"I'm serious, Akane. You _will _regret this decision if you walk away."

Sighing, Akane placed some cash in her sister's hand before angrily crossing her arms over her chest. "Well? What is this amazing piece of advice that's going to cause me regret if I ignore it?"

Nabiki smiled as her sister's melodramatic explanation before slipping the money in her back pocket. "Ukyo gave me an okonomiyaki with a gracious tip to install wires and cameras into your room. Or, should I say, yours and Ranma's room. All I'm saying is that you be more careful about what you say to Ranma, alright?"

"Gee, Nabiki, if she paid you why exactly are you helping me?"

"Because, my dear sister," she began dramatically, "You paid me, as well. As I've said, I'm always on the side of money! Ta-ta!"

Akane watched her sister depart, knowing that it wasn't the money behind her sister's generosity. Sometimes, even though it was hard to imagine, Nabiki cared for some things other than money. Sometimes, of course. Following her sister into the kitchen, she formed a lie to justify why Nabiki took her outside before Ukyo became suspicious. "That cockroach was disgusting, Nabiki! It made me lost my appetite!" Akane began before heading to the stairs. "It's pretty late so I'm just going to head off to bed. Are you coming, Ranma?"

"Sure," was his one-word response as he began following her upstairs as well.

"Thanks for killing it for me anyway, Akane," Nabiki said. "Get some sleep you two, some of us actually have to go places in the morning. Save it for when no one's home."

Their faces ignited, the couple dashing upstairs only to hear their fathers cheering as they went to retrieve some sake for pre-wedding celebration. "It's a good day, isn't it, Tendo?" She heard Genma say.

"The only better day would be on their wedding, Saotome!"

She latched on to Ranma's elbows, quickly whispering in his ear the information she was told outside. Forgetting about their father's howls for a moment, Ranma nodded slowly, opening the bedroom door. "I stay on my side right?"

"Oh, you silly!" Akane laughed, punching Ranma in the gut. "You can sleep wherever you want as long as it's with me!" Then she added more quietly: "God, Ranma! Don't make it sound so formal!"

"Oh, right," he reminded himself, sudden butterflies returning to his stomach. You would think he would be slightly more comfortable since it was his second time doing this... but he wasn't. It was just as nerving, and he could tell she felt the same since her expression mirrored his own.

"I guess I'll listen to Nabiki's advice for once and head off to bed," she laughed uneasily, adjusting the sleeves on her shirt. "You can get in first, I have to use the bathroom and change into pajamas anyway..."

For some odd reason, Ranma wasn't feeling so tired, and sleeping was the last thing on his mind. Ukyo would be observing them, so alone time with Akane wasn't so tempting. "It's still a little early," he began, purposely glancing at her clock. "Wanna stay up for a little?"

Her eyes widened, and as if practiced, both of their faces darkened in perfect synchronization. "Sure," she replied, seating herself on the floor with her back leaning against the bed. She smiled a little when Ranma sat down next to her instead of choosing any other location in the bedroom. Racking her brain for a conversation starter, she began, "What exactly _was_ that incident that you were speaking about at dinner?"

He blushed, tugging at his collar. "An old story..."

"I wanna hear it anyway," she prodded, glancing at him through the corner of her eye.

"Well, I ain't tellin'."

"It was probably a lame story of you peeing your pants or something," she figured, her eyes catching the sight of his body going rigid. "Wait, it is about you peeing your pants?"

"Go ahead and laugh." He muttered, turning his head away from her.

So, she took his advice and did just that. Bursting into laughter, she held her stomach as she attempted to imagine an eight-year-old Ranma dashing around a classroom with his damp pants clinging to his slender legs. She ignored his glares until she emptied her system of laughter, sighing contentedly as she wiped away a tear with a single finger.

"It wasn't that funny!" He whined, "It was in front of the whole class! I didn't finish my homework and got... well, nervous!"

She cleared her throat, "When I was in the second grade I, um, passed gas while trying to present my horrible excuse for artwork. I was taunted for months, until," she broke off, raising her fists. "I taught those stupid kids who they were messing with."

He bit his tongue, making a great effort to restrain himself. But, after a few seconds, he began laughing hardly, rolling around on the floor exaggeratedly as he slammed his fists on the ground. Akane. Passed. _Gas!_ The event of wetting his pants faded alongside his embarrassment as he found more interest in Akane passing anything other than a test. "Yours- yours is so much worse!"

She blushed, clenching her hands in fists. "Nu-uh! Aren't you suppose to be a martial artist? Why couldn't you have control over your bladder?"

"Yeah, but it's _normal _for guys at that age to pee. What's your excuse, Tomboy!" He answered through his laughter, finally gaining composure to at least diminish his laughter into a chuckle.

"I never should have told you!" She spat, crossing her arms childishly. "Goodness, Ranma. It wasn't _that _funny!"

"Don't be so sensitive, Akane," he laughed, poking her cheeks with his finger. "You laughed at mine."

"I'm going to bed," she huffed before rising abruptly.

"Come on," he continued, grabbing her arm and pulling her with such force she was now entangled in his embrace, her head laying on his chest. "Aren't you more comfortable with me, _honey_?"

She felt her head spin at their close proximity, but suddenly realized she was more comfortable in this position. She understood their circumstances and the fact they were acting, but all anger evaporated from her body as she felt her heart soar with joy. She wondered if Ranma was toying with her, and waited to hear a "gotcha!" of some sort– but none ever came. She readjusted herself, rising her head so it was now on his shoulder as her fingers grasped his shirt gently. With a small smile on her lips, she closed her eyes and began to drift off.

It was meant as a joke. That was his intention, anyway. He was expecting her to shove him away and crawl into bed stubbornly remaining angry with him. But, this was completely beyond his imagination. It was so uncharacteristic for her to behave this way, not that he wasn't complaining. But, something must have happened for her to let him do something. Element of surprise, maybe?

He slowly tilted his head to glance at her face, "Is this okay?" He asked half-heartedly, not wanting a rejection of any sort when he came this far. He made sure to mutter the words quickly so Ukyo couldn't read their lips or listen to their hushed whispers. What he saw instead was his silent fiancee breathing softly, her lips curved in a smile.

He could swear his heart was about to burst out of his chest. "Don't complain to me about this tomorrow," he ordered, slinging his arm around her ribs and resting his head on top of hers. "'Night, Akane."

"It's official," Ukyo thought, gazing at the couple murderously. "It's time time to bring in Shampoo."

**-XxX-**

A/N: So, I'm back to school again and am more busier than ever! Goodness, being a junior is not fun at all! D: Anywho, this is my latest installment of Ranma and Akane because who knows when I'll update next! Won't be so long, I promise.

I realize Ukyo isn't really a manipulative girl, but she is getting desperate with Ranma so it's obviously time to bring out the big guns. I hope you enjoyed and please don't forget to review! :)

Ranma x Akane = 3


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½

**-XxX-**

You Want Us To What!

**-XxX-**

**Chapter three**

**-XxX-**

She was certain she was going to regret this decision, but she still managed to drag herself down to the Nekoten so early in the morning. She was clearly unsuccessful in her attempts to destroy Ranma and Akane, but this was _desperation _on her part to actually come visit Shampoo to seek aid. In the past she always worked solo on trying to win Ranma over, only meeting Shampoo halfway during her effort. Or, whenever they met on the battlefield- which was quite often.

Sighing, she loosened the strap on her spatula in case the Amazon tried to turn this calm meeting into a blood bath and casually approached the restaurant, sliding the door open. Her eyes quickly scanned the area and found Shampoo tending to a table of four: parents, one boy, and a girl. Another sigh escaped her lips and she encouraged herself that his _had _to be done. With Shampoo's help the girls could off Akane and with her gone they could fight amongst themselves to see who would get Ranma. With that last thought in mind, the girl poked the waitress on the shoulder. "Hey, Shampoo."

"Is only ramen, yes? Someone be with you shortly then. Thank you for wait." The minute they were face-to-face, Shampoo's sweet act dropped and a more smug look was apparent on her face. "What Spatula Girl want? Shampoo very busy now!"

_The nerve, _Ukyo thought angrily to herself as Shampoo brushed past her and escaped into the back to deliver the order. _She couldn't just greet me properly? _Ignoring her instinct to tear the girl to shreds then and there, she instead jogged after her, keeping her facial expression indifferent. "Shampoo? I need to talk to you."

"I say I very busy. Unlike you store, Shampoo really has customers."

That was the last straw. "What did you say?! I'll have you know that my store is doing very well!" Ukyo leaped over the counter and went into the back, ignoring Mousse's protesting quacks. She was pretty sure that if she walked around with such a skimpy waitressing outfit, she would have a lot more customers as well! Shampoo continued mincing the vegetables, completely ignore the okonomiyaki chef. After a few minutes she ordered the now male Mousse to finish the order.

"What you want?" Shampoo said finally, drying her hands with a towel before tossing it back in the sink.

"I... I need your help." Ukyo responded hesitantly.

"Shampoo help? With what?"

Inhaling deeply Ukyo started the story from the very beginning, from when she first created her special sauce and how Ranma messed with the ingredients and how him and Akane were now pretending to be married. She kept watch of Shampoo's facial features, never seeing such a flurry of emotions evident on a single person's face. "The problem is," she continued miserably. "They're doing this whole married thing really well. Like really, _really _well. That's why I'm here to ask for your help. We need to find a way to prove that they're not married."

"Stupid pervert girl try sleep with Ranma before Shampoo," the Amazon growled, denting the counter with her fist. "Shampoo no allow it. Ukyo, I help you stop stupid Akane."

Ukyo felt a sudden weight lifted off her shoulder as she smiled. "Just the response I was hoping for."

**-XxX-**

Akane squirmed uncomfortably, causing another sigh to erupt from the pigtailed boy next to her. "What?" She challenged, and he turned so their faces we next to each other. She instantly blushed and began to squirm once more. How could she _not _be uncomfortable under these circumstances?

"You keep moving around."

"I'm uncomfortable."

"Lose weight and they'll be enough space between us."

"Oh, really? I'll lose weight when you become a real man!"

"I am a man! A man-among-men, even!"

"Yeah, and pigs can fly," she countered, ignoring his next comment of calling her "uncute". She didn't know what Nabiki was thinking, putting them up to this. It was the middle Tendo's idea to make Ranma and Akane practice sleeping in the same bed so that they wouldn't be so nervous while doing the real thing. Which was ironic, however, considering she was a lot more nervous now. Whenever they went to sleep, she tried her very best to fall asleep quickly so she wouldn't have to deal with her head swelling with thoughts of Ranma and feet brushing every once in awhile. But now she was forced to be in bed with Ranma for practice– while Ukyo wasn't even here!

To make it even worse, Nabiki had forced Ranma into wearing his usual garb when he was sleeping: boxers and a tank top. She advised him to get accustom to it since he would be wearing the actual thing tonight. Akane squirmed once more, followed by Ranma's customary sigh. What was bothering him anyway? This was his third time sighing since they arrived into her bedroom. "Hey, Ranma. Are you okay? You're sighing up a storm."

"I'm just thinking."

"You? Thinking? This can't be good." She joked, sticking her tongue out after Ranma shot her a glare.

"I think there has to be some way to end this quicker." Staring intensely at Akane he added: "a date."

"A date?" she repeated, her eyes widening. Did he know what he was asking her?

Ranma Saotome, in the first time of his life, was sucked dry of his confidence. He had summoned all his courage to ask her, under Nabiki's encouraging "do it or I'll make sure to triple the cost of the money you owe me" advice. It offered him a chance to rid of Ukyo and her crazy ideas, plus he kind of wanted to go. The last two nights made Akane seem more close to him in ways she never had. Maybe she was playing pretend, but he had stopped long ago. He looked forward to being close to Akane without her mallet being wielded at any time. But, looking at her bulging eyes, he realized that she was not the least bit interested in him or the date. "You know," he began, attempting to save face, "I just think if we go on a fake date to convince Ukyo we're married, she'll leave. You don't have to worry though, it's not real."

Of course it wasn't, her mind scolded. None of this was. Ranma was playing actor for Ukyo, and she was getting her hopes up for no reason. She sat upright and threw her feet off the side of the bed, hiding her face from him. "Fake date? Good idea!" She lied, her feet dangling. "Ukyo will leave and we won't have to pretend anymore. We can finally stop pretending."

The last sentence caught him off guard. It wasn't as though she was telling him, but asking him? He shook his head clear of such thoughts. He was analyzing things way too much. "Yeah. Ukyo's restaurant is closed tomorrow, we can go then," he felt tension hanging in the air, so to lighten up the mood he added: "Oh, and Akane?"

She cleared her throat. "Yeah?"

"You better not order way too much food like all those other girls," she shot him a glare and he grinned. "It would not help your figure at all. Trust me."

Well, two can play at that game, she thought to herself. "Oh? You meant that we were going on a date as a couple? I figured we were going as two friends since I know how hard it is for you to stay in guy form. What with all your... issues."

"You're so, so, so, so, _**so**_uncute!"

She laughed, feeling her heart beating fast. Even if this was just pretend, this was a date! With Ranma, no less! This would be their second, if you technically counted that other time with the whole Nabiki incident. If they managed to pull it off, they would never have to play pretend again. They could go back to normal. She watched Ranma leap off the bed and yawn, yelling to Nabiki downstairs that their practice time was up.

She felt a nagging in her heart that she ignored. The nagging attempting to convince her that she was happy this way. She shook her head and rose from the bed, determined to buy a new outfit for their upcoming date. She felt the same as she did back then, when Nabiki told her Ranma had asked her for a date. Even without the circumstances, she smiled broadly. "I'm so... happy."

**-XxX-**

"Date?" Shampoo repeated, smiling at Ukyo. "Shampoo have too good plan!"

Ukyo returned her smile. "I sometimes almost like you, Shampoo."

**-XxX-**

A/N: This has to be the shortest chapter I have ever written, but I wanted to save the date for another chapter where I can do with it what I please. I'm sorry this chapter is so late! _ Things have just been out-of-control haha. I typed this up quickly, so I'm not sure if there are any grammar errors and apologize if there are.

I don't think this chapter is that good, and I'm sorry for that too! I hope at least some of you will enjoy this chapter! Thanks for all of the reviews, it makes me so bubbly! (:

Hopefully I upload soon and don't keep you guys waiting for months. Gah. Please review and tell me what you think! Constructive criticism is always welcome.


End file.
